Friday 6 March 2009

Police and Thieves

Think of ducks....
Last night I visited an good friend of mine who lives in a council estate around the corner from me. It was her 65th birthday and my best friend and I paid her a visit laden with some cakes and presents. We left her place at 9.30pm and as we headed down the stairs to the car we walked past some dodgy looking characters milling around on the stairwell. The estate is renown for its edginess.

As we drove out of the estate to head to a cashpoint a few streets away, I noticed that we were being tailed by a police car. I thought it odd because I was observing the speed limits and driving properly. Anyway, as I turned into a side street and alongside the cash machine the police pulled up behind and a female and two male cops jumped out. They proceeded to accuse us of being drug dealers- in fact one of them said that I had been driving like a drug dealer. What does a drug dealer drive like?

After being body searched in the street and the car checked over they realised that this was not going to be a Miami Vice moment for them, so after doing their paperwork they left us in peace. 

I have not been stopped by the law for years. One of the last times was in the 80's when I was peering through some iron railings looking for Ring Ouzel in an allotment near Brent Reservoir, north London. All of a sudden a police car screeched to a halt by me and an unpleasant officer barked at me demanding to know what I was doing. When I told him that I was birding he made me name the types of bird that I was looking for. He and his mate began to glaze over when I started reeling of Aquatic Warbler, Brunnich's Guillemot and Stone Curlew. They abruptly sped off.

The moral of the story? 

If you are ever stopped by the police and accused of drug dealing, think of farmyard ducks. That way, you will never loose your cool and become agitated like a true drug dealer.

Well, it worked for me!

4 comments:

Alan Tilmouth said...

Many years ago I was part of a crack team apprehended in a car park known for all sorts of dodgy goings on. It took us a little while to explain to the boys in blue that we were on a charity bird race and not setting off for armed robbery.

Alan Tilmouth said...

David this guy has the Defensive Driving market in Florida sewn up. It would make a great programme, Urban Birding whilst learning how to Drive Defensively.... or maybe not.

Fraser Simpson said...

Well, that's definitely more exciting than being stopped for photographing herons with a tripod in the 'royal' parks!
Good tip though - I'll try and think of plastic ducks if it's the PCSO's.

Unknown said...

Me and my mates got stopped just last year, walking through our local woods, were in that age range which gets targeted 16-18, a policeman shouted we have you surrounded , i'm sending the dogs in, we knew we wern't surrounded and there was no dogs so we walked out, grabbing us by the collars he said he knew what we were doing, I asked him 'what was i doing' and he shouted drugs, me and my mates don't drink, smoke, or do drugs so at this statment we bursted into laughter, he wasn't amused. We got taken to the van where we were questioned, accusing my friend to be on drugs because he was smiling, and then being called good boys repeatedley and then let go, with the words, 'don't go in there again'